Humans have a tendency to want to group together. We want to be part of the tribe, accepted by society – it’s ingrained in us from the days when strength in numbers meant the difference between survival and the alternative option. True nonconformists – who genuinely have no care for what others think of them – are incredibly rare.
Nevertheless, it’s enticing, isn’t it? The idea of just letting you be you, and not really caring about how that might fit in with the general picture of society. There’s plenty of encouragement to go down this road, but it’s still something that few of us manage to live by. Being bold – be it in our grooming, fashion, or lifestyle choices – just isn’t something that comes naturally. It rubs against the grain, but that doesn’t stop it being appealing.
If you have ever felt that you are shoehorned into decisions by what society expects of you, then breaking free of those constraints can be one of the most important things you ever do. All you need to appreciate is that it’s not like flicking a switch; it takes time and effort, but it’s worth it if you get there.
Step 1: Realize You Can’t Control What People Think
It shouldn’t be that big a realization but for many of us, it is: we can’t control what other people think of us. You could agonize over an outfit for days or check your haircut in 1,000 mirrors, but there will always be someone who doesn’t like it. If you’re trying to please everyone, you’ve set yourself onto a task that you can’t ever complete.
Why It Works: If you can’t control what people think or always have others approve, then surely it’s better to go out of your way to do what you like? At least then you’re pleasing someone!
Step 2: Accept The Stares
If you decide to wear your hair long, then you might garner a few glances while out and about. People might even nudge their friends or make a whispered joke about your girly hair; it’s enough to make you run through walls to get your hands on a choice from http://hairclippercenter.net/a-definite-guide-to-buying-the-best-hair-clipper/ so you can trim back to conformity.
Then again… so what? They’re looking at you and passing comment, but they could be doing that for any reason. If you wore your hair perfectly conventionally, then someone could still point and stare at your choice of wristwatch.
Why It Works: Seeing staring people as just a part of life, a sign of rudeness – as discussed at http://people.howstuffworks.com/why-is-it-rude-to-stare.htm – on their part, is the way to go. People are going to look, so why not give them something to look at?
Step 3: Understand It’s All About Confidence
Have you ever heard reference to the idea that an outfit, hairstyle, or life choice can be “pulled off” by someone? As in: “it’s a crazy look, but he makes it work, he’s pulling it off…”
The only thing that creates this illusion is confidence. If you make your choices and are confident in them, then you “pull them off”. If you look nervous or worried about judgment, then it won’t work for you.
Why It Works: Changing up your style and choices to options that make you feel good will help that inner confidence. All you need to do is let it radiate through, and soon, you’ll garner a reputation for being able to make anything work.